What the hell got me here?

I am a college-educated, literate woman that is about to turn 59 and cannot get a job. Granted, I used the best years of my life to be a stay-at-home Mom and raise my four kids. I had them later then most. I did not leave them to go to work. We chose being poor over vacations and new furniture and a bigger house. Now that I have time, with only one son left at home, he is 18 and pretty independent and wise. I could go to work, if I could find a job that made it worth my while. Idaho is noted for it’s low salaries. It is barely worth the effort to take a job that requires you to commute, as all your earnings are eaten up with gas costs. There is no decent public transportation here. All I really want to do is be able to pay my student loans off, help my kids with college and have a little extra for a small vacation once a year. We live simply, garden, cook our meals, see bargain movies and I shop at resale stores. What the hell am I to do? I guess I will keep painting, hope I get some more art students, read a lot and try and have dinner ready when the breadwinner drives into the driveway.

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